realms

#REALMS : EXPLANATION

REALMS was initially an art project of mine to explore myself. I had put it on hiatus for quite some time.

Recently I picked it back up, however I had found something unexpected in the last file I edited.

I continued it, but it's contents still puzzle me.

Enjoy. Feel free to browse the hashtag.

There exists a version of me that nobody can see. It's stuck in-between our realm and another, despite our best efforts.

This one...it feels. It feels more than I do. It expresses more than I do.

Sometimes, it comes to the front, the very wall between our realms. It wants to tell me something, but we can't hear each other. We try different ways to talk, but we can't make up our minds.

Do they need help? Do they know something I don't? How can I get them over on my side? How can I hear them?

Maybe someone else can help them cross? Maybe I need a tool?

Whatever it is, I haven't found it yet. Maybe there's a hint somewhere...somewhere far away.

I'm not sure I'll ever get there, I am not even sure where the solution might be...

Maybe, one day.

- ONE.

#REALMS : TWO

Maybe the solution is not an entry, a swap, but to break it. I need to break the barrier.

If I look around, I might find clues; I might find references of those long past.

The wall does not seem solid,

#REALMS : THREE

I have noticed something interesting

Looking back at [TWO], there was a sentence I had never written, or at least I don't remember writing it...

Is there a chance she found a way and didn't tell me? She seems quiet about this, unmoved.

I'll have to keep investigating

#REALMS : FOUR

many things are left unexplained

i have not heard of her in a while

i wonder if she will come back

and what she will have to say

#REALMS : FIVE

i am starting to become worried...maybe she is anxious about tommorow?

it seems that I am diving into the unknown...well, not really. there was a long time I lived without her.

maybe my role was to protect her? At the same time, she's someone I used to know like the back of my hand...

#REALMS : SIX

Doin' a little experiment today: I have noticed that she not only seemingly added a paragraph in [TWO], but also she...made herself toast overnight??

Nobody else here ate toast, and I sure as fuck was not conscious nor do I remember

So here is the actual experiment...

I wrote “would you like to be called kitty?” on a piece of paper and left a pen.

If she actually does just answer that would be crazy...

#REALMS : SEVEN

The experiment has, so far, not worked. It seems I might have scared her off in trying this. I will leave it out just in case she does want to respond

Another theory I've had is that we might be converging...it would explain why I've not been fealing nearly as empty as of late...

More experiments shall show what is happening.

#REALMS : EIGHT

Yesterday night was rough.

On the one hand, I was able to see her again, on the other hand...it was only due to distress

This does confirm however that, in the end, we might just be converging.

This would mean that when I am in distress, we split apart, and the wall is what keeps us apart.

It confirms some of the suspicions and theories I've had before, too.

#REALMS : NINE

and so, she cries again. all alone, no one to reach for

entirely mute, unheard by all, hoping that she doesn't suddenly fall

I sit separate, behind a glass wall

like watching a test of how long one can cry

before hope dies.