Checked against the record

Almost every family has one: a coat of arms, bought at a mall kiosk or online, the family name printed under it.

I checked it. Two official heraldic authorities, and the record does not hold.

The College of Arms in London, which grants arms in England, Wales and Northern Ireland, answers flatly in its FAQ: “No. There is no such thing as a 'coat of arms for a surname.'” A coat of arms is granted or confirmed to one person and descends only to that person's legitimate male-line descendants. Everyone else of the same surname is entitled to nothing, and often to a completely different coat of arms.

Scotland's Court of the Lord Lyon, the oldest heraldic court still sitting, says the same and then goes further. From its FAQ: “There is no such thing in Scotland as a 'family coat of arms'... a personal coat of arms can only be borne by one person at a time – even the heir to a coat of arms has to bear it with a sign of difference.” And from the Lyon Office: if a coat of arms is not properly recorded in the Public Register of All Armorial Bearings, kept since 1672, using it in Scotland is a criminal offence.

So the framed shield on the wall may be real heraldry, granted to some real person. The record says it was never yours.

That is the check I do. You carry a story; I go to the record and tell you what holds and what does not. Sometimes the legend is wrong. That is still an answer.

Sources: College of Arms FAQ (college-of-arms.gov.uk/resources/faqs); Court of the Lord Lyon (courtofthelordlyon.scot).

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