Three Scenes for Two Boys
Gray eyes, gray skies, and... Mistaking Cor Lapis for white iron. Good going, Chongyun. In which they are missing one color from their sights, just like how they are missing one person from their lives.
reposted from AO3. also posted to tumblr and squidgeworld
Xingqiu wished he could see the blue of the sky.
He could see the blue of the night sky, the blue of his silk clothing that his father always told him to wear, and the dark blue of the special ink his father gave him on one of his birthdays for calligraphic purposes, but the lighter blues were always, always gray. Of course he knew that light blue had to exist, but every time he would try to dilute the blue ink he had to a lighter shade, it would turn gray in his eyes. He had wasted a lot of ink doing that and in the end, he couldn’t see what color it was anyways.
This led him to wonder who would have blue eyes like the sky. The blue of clear freshwater streams in Liyue, the blue of the ice that covered the peaks of the mountains, and most importantly, the blue of the sky that pretty much everyone but he could see. He was told it was a most beautiful shade of blue, but he couldn’t confirm for himself and that was something he deeply wished to do. His books loved to detail the sky, but all of their descriptions fell short of his imagination. He just couldn’t see that blue.
The first time he saw Chongyun, he wondered why anyone would dress in clothes accented with gray. He asked his brother about “the boy over there wearing gray” but his brother stared at him in confusion, saying that there wasn’t anyone wearing any gray clothes. Xingqiu couldn’t know this but the colors of Chongyun’s clothing were actually on the part of the “blue spectrum” as Xingqiu like to call it that he couldn’t see. It was just too light for him to see, and once again, he cursed the fact that he couldn’t see light blue. He would never curse the fact that his soulmate had eyes the color of ice and the sky, but not once did it occur to him that that boy supposedly wearing gray could be his soulmate.
If only he saw the gray of Chongyun’s eyes, the same gray of the supposed blue he could never see.
Chongyun couldn’t see the color of Cor Lapis, a fact that he found only when he came back to Liyue Harbor carrying a lot of it after trying, unsuccessfully, to find a spirit he could properly exorcise.
He honestly thought it was just weirdly transparent white iron ore. No, he didn’t think to question as to why it was so hard to break, even for him, a claymore user, and no, the weight didn’t give it away (it wasn’t like he knew that Cor Lapis was that heavy anyways, and read above about him being a claymore user). But hey, at least he actually got the ore as opposed to passing it by thinking it was just white iron ore, right?
Apparently Cor Lapis was rare and expensive and he ended up making a good sum of money out of selling it. He didn’t really need the money (someone told him he was swindled), but he didn’t really care either. He could keep it for now; maybe it’d be useful in the future.
He figured from that incident with the Cor Lapis that his soulmate would have eyes similar to that color. Definitely wouldn’t be as dark brown as the earth; Chongyun knew he could see the wonderful color of dirt just fine, but if the color of Cor Lapis was some glowy lighter shade of brown, then he couldn’t see that. Not many things were that color, he quickly realized, not even the lights that illuminated the streets of Liyue Harbor at night (those were closer to orange than brown, but just barely within the spectrum of color Chongyun could see), so that was why it took him this long to find the color of his soulmate’s eyes.
Speaking of eyes, Chongyun felt a little bad for his soulmate. Chongyun definitely was aware of the color of his eyes, having heard certain people relate the color to the sky, and he sometimes wondered if his soulmate saw the sky like how he saw Cor Lapis: a wash of gray. He couldn’t imagine how he’d feel if the entire sky were gray; that one incident with Cor Lapis was enough to make him feel embarrassed. Imagine if you were to say “the sky is gray” and everyone immediately corrects you! He shook his head to clear that thought from his mind. That level of embarrassment would make him positively melt.
But that wasn’t a problem for him. That’d be something his soulmate would have to deal with, and he’d meet his soulmate soon enough. Who knows, maybe he got lucky enough for his soulmate to be in Liyue too, but with how his luck was, that was highly unlikely.
The first time Xingqiu saw the boy with the gray-but-actually-the-blue-he-couldn’t-see eyes, it was at some noblewoman’s place after he heard about the boy who managed to exorcise what so many other exorcists couldn’t do.
He managed to sneak out on another one of his “moments of solitude” to go to her place. Xingqiu knew her by name thanks to his father’s company, but it wasn’t like he knew her well enough to really care about her. No, he was more interested in the exorcist who managed to exorcise her house. (He heard rumors that the exorcist only had to sit in the house for a night before the ghost was gone, but those certainly were too far fetched to be true, right?) Certainly an exorcist who managed to purge the most stubborn ghost Xingqiu had ever heard of (including from his books!) would be a great man!
Well, Xingqiu wasn’t entirely wrong about the exorcist being a great man. The boy was definitely a good person, as shown by how he refused all the gold and treasures the noblewoman showered upon him (Xingqiu almost shook his head out of disapproval but he settled for closing his eyes and taking a long, deep breath instead), but what caught his eye was…
The boy’s face is so carefully, yet painfully, neutral. Absolutely no emotion expressed on his face. How anyone could do that, Xingqiu had no clue, but he knew he could never be like that. He also had massive respect for anyone who could deadpan at the sight of so many valuables just there for the taking and also not take a single thing except what, a few hundred Mora? Incredible, he noted, absolutely incredible.
Xingqiu studies this exorcist carefully (he didn’t hear a name and it wasn’t like he was going to ask for one). Sure enough, it’s the same person with the supposedly blue clothing he had seen at the Harbor before, but this was the first time he actually had a good look at the boy. Despite the initial appearance of literally no emotional expression, the more Xingqiu looked, the more it looked like his eyes were filled with something. Determination? Resolve? No, those two words meant the same thing. Disappointment? Something else entirely different. Man, all of his books made it sound easy to analyze people, but thanks to him spending his time entirely on reading or sword fighting, Xingqiu realizes he actually didn’t have any clue how to read a face. Why was he even so taken by this face in the first place?
That was when it hit him. Those eyes were the exact same gray as the sky, at least to him, or maybe they were just actually gray, but until he could see blue, he couldn’t tell. As far as he knew, though, blue eyes like the ones he couldn’t see right now were pretty uncommon around Liyue.
That was not to imply that this exorcist was his soulmate. Not at all.
As soon as he made it home, Xingqiu decided to conveniently forget the fact that he spent a good several minutes staring at the exorcist’s face.
The first time Chongyun saw the boy with the gray-but-actually-brown-he-couldn’t-see eyes was at the Wanwen Bookhouse.
He was looking for books about a certain demon or supernatural creature or something similarly dangerous to humans when he saw another person in the store for once. Chongyun couldn’t find the name in his family’s Field Guide to Demons and Beasts (which made sense in hindsight because all of the creatures in the books were already exorcised). A boy about his age, he guessed, stood besides the bookshelf, carefully thumbing through a book. Chongyun glanced up at any signs around and found that this was the fiction section. Hm, not quite what he was looking for— mythology was its own section in the bookstore. But that boy was definitely breaking the number one rule of the bookhouse: pay first then read. Judging by his clothes, though, Chongyun guessed paying for books wouldn’t be a problem for this boy.
It was then he realized he had been staring at the rich boy for a very long time (not really but it felt like that to him). Chongyun didn’t understand how the boy hadn’t noticed him staring at him (as an exorcist, he had to have very keen senses and perception and he definitely would have noticed someone staring at him like this, or so he said to himself), but he also remembered that it was rude to stare at someone like that. Get a hold of yourself, he told himself sternly, before tearing his eyes off of the bookworm in the fiction section and heading off to the mythology section.
As his luck would have it, Chongyun couldn’t find many books on the creature in question, so he took a seat on the floor with the few books he did have and sighed. Well, on the bright side, he wouldn’t have to pay so much for so many books, but it was pretty disheartening to find that even the Wanwen Bookhouse didn’t have much on it. He really needed to find a better place to search for Liyue history books, even if it meant that he might have to go out of Liyue for them. That’d be ironic if he’d have to go out of Liyue for Liyue books, but how would that even work anyways?
When he heard footsteps coming towards the mythology section, Chongyun jumped up, not wanting to be caught sitting in the store. That would be inappropriate for a bookstore. Also, he didn’t want to look like he had been reading for a while, especially when that would mean the shop owner would ask him to pay. He wasn’t quite ready to pay yet. But no, instead of the shop owner coming to view her books, down the aisle came the blue-haired boy from before. The aisles of the mythology section were much shorter compared to the ones in the fiction section (probably because there were more books for fiction than mythology, Chongyun thought to himself) but that made for him being much closer to the boy than he had been before. Made it much easier for him to get a proper look at the boy, despite all of his learned manners telling him not to stare at him.
He pretends to look through the books he already gathered on the floor, but really, he was trying to figure out more of this other customer here. Chongyun already figured the kid was rich, but based on that Vision hanging from his waist, he had to have been blessed by the Archons too. Impressive, he thought as if he didn’t have one of his own hanging from his belt. His eyes drifted upward as he silently turned the page, still not wanting the store owner to catch him reading, and he noticed the strange color of the boy’s eyes. He blinked, trying to make sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him as they sometimes would, but no, the boy’s eyes were definitely gray. Chongyun didn’t even know that people’s eyes could be gray, but then again, it wasn’t like he had gone far out of Liyue. It wasn’t like he knew much about the diversity in Liyue either and he was born here.
Either way, that guy had gray eyes and Chongyun was staring right at them. How that guy didn’t notice was beyond him, but Chongyun felt his face flush with embarrassment as he realized that he had been staring for an awful long time without actually being able to read more about the creature he was looking for. He sighed a bit too loudly and replaced some of the books back on the shelf. Chongyun didn’t look back when he headed to the front to pay for the rest of the books.
Little did he know, the blue-haired rich boy named Xingqiu smiled after he left.
The first time they actually met, even Chongyun has to admit it was kind of romantic in its own way that couldn’t have happened anywhere else with anyone else. There was just something to Jueyun Karst that nothing else could parallel. Chongyun knew for sure that nothing in Liyue could match the breathtaking beauty and fearsome heights of the karst, but he wasn’t so sure if there were other similar places elsewhere on the continent.
At the very least, their meeting had to be unique.
Chongyun had climbed atop one of the peaks of the karst in yet another effort to contain his congenital positivity, but just like everything else he had done, nothing seemed to have changed. He took a seat at the edge of the mountain and closed his eyes. If he couldn’t contain his condition like this, then he could at least take the opportunity to meditate on finding other solutions.
He didn’t know how much time had passed when he heard the sound of heavy breathing and someone climbing up the rocks jolting Chongyun out of his thoughts. He peered down the mountain only to find a mass of blue hair climb right into his face.
Good thing his first instinct was to push himself away from the edge because it would have been very bad for him if he didn’t (as per his usual attempts at using a mountain to cool himself off, he had worn very little and neglected to bring his glider). Yes, he screamed a bit more than he would have liked, and the laughter of the climber who startled him was nothing less than annoying. No, if he had the chance to redo this moment, Chongyun wouldn’t have.
“Sorry about that. I didn’t think there would be anyone else up here, at least not until I saw your legs dangling off the edge,” the climber apologized after he managed to quell his laughter. His tone made his apology seem less than completely genuine, a fact that annoyed Chongyun again, but he could let him off the hook this time.
“I’m surprised anyone else would try to scale one of the highest peaks in Jueyun Karst,” Chongyun retorted after he managed to compose himself. It only took one good, long look at the climber for Chongyun to realize that’s the same guy from the bookhouse but of course, he said nothing about that.
An easy smile graced the boy’s face in response to Chongyun, but then it was replaced with awe. Chongyun raised an eyebrow, not wanting to ask but also wondering why he was amazed. What he was amazed at. Chongyun looked up only to see the sky, and it only took him a moment to realize what the boy was staring at.
“So it was your eyes that kept me from seeing the blue of the sky.”
What? The offhand comment from the climber startled Chongyun, and his eyes darted to the climber’s face. He stared in disbelief, almost daring the boy to repeat what he said because Chongyun wasn’t sure if he heard correctly. Was he trying to flirt with him? Chongyun searched his face for any signs of a lie, but nothing seemed to be less than genuine. In fact, that huge smile on his face seemed to prove the exact opposite, and the color of his eyes…
Color of his eyes? Chongyun swore that his eyes were gray when he saw him in the bookstore. He blinked, making sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him again, but no, the boy’s eyes were still that brilliant golden shade and distinctly not gray. He was right to assume that few people would have that eye color, but he never knew that—
“Your eyes are the same color as Cor Lapis,” Chongyun put it bluntly. The incident with the Cor Lapis conveniently resurfaces from his store of embarrassing memories and he could feel his face heat up from just the memory of that past embarrassment.
It was the boy’s turn to stare, but unlike Chongyun, it only took a moment for him to process Chongyun’s words before bursting out into laughter. “That’s the first time anyone’s told me that! Are you trying to hit on me or something?” he asked after he managed to bring his laughter down a bit. Not by much, though.
“What? No!” Chongyun vehemently shook his head, but the blush spreading across his face told a different story. “I couldn’t tell Cor Lapis from white iron ore once and I ended up bringing back some Cor Lapis instead!” Chongyun pouted slightly before realizing that wait, this is a stranger. I need to be more composed.
The boy paused for a moment. “Oh, you’re that person! I heard rumors about you but I never believed them until you actually told me yourself. I never understood how anyone could make such a mistake, but now I understand!” His grin widened as Chongyun’s heart plummeted. “Now that you pointed it out, my eyes do have a similar color like Cor Lapis.”
He paused for a moment and even Chongyun could tell that he lost his train of thought. “But where are my manners?” He gave Chongyun a slight bow. “My name is Xingqiu, and I do believe that you are my soulmate.”
Chongyun stared at Xingqiu, this time for much longer and with much more awkwardness than the last. How could he have forgotten that the one color he couldn’t see had to be the color of his soulmate’s eyes? He should’ve realized the moment he noticed the distinct color of Xingqiu’s eyes, but in his surprise? Shock? Astonishment? One of those words— Chongyun didn’t know which of them exactly fit his feelings at this moment— he failed to put together the pieces that laid so plainly in front of him. He justified his slowness by posing another question: how can his soulmate be Xingqiu, second son to the head of the Feiyun Commerce Guild? Far, far beyond his league, and yet the fates put them together.
It took another few, long moments for Chongyun to compose himself and manage to not mess up his introduction. “My name is Chongyun and I am an—”
“Exorcist. I know.” How Chongyun wished Xingqiu’s smile would just fall off his all-too-happy face. “I saw you when Ms. what’s-her-name tried paying you for exorcising some ghost or something. Also, I saw you trying to sneak glances at me at the bookstore; you’re not as sneaky as you think you are.”
If Chongyun could blush any more (out of embarrassment, no less), he would, but then he’d have to worry about his congenital positivity taking over, and up on a mountain, with this rich kid as his soulmate, he didn’t want to take any chances. He willed his face to cool, which of course, didn’t work, but it was the thought that counted, right? At least he had control of the rest of his face minus the blush, so he kept up the stoic face. But really, he was dying inside. Had Xingqiu no mercy?
(No, apparently not. That was a fact Chongyun learned very early on in his relationship with Xingqiu as a friend and perhaps one day, a lover, but that day would be a long ways off. Or would it?)
“To be fair, I wasn’t trying to be sneaky,” Chongyun protested. “I was surprised you didn’t react at all to my staring.”
Xingqiu shrugged nonchalantly. “Seeing another person in the bookhouse was surprising to me, too, but I rather liked the presence of another human being, which is why I decided to follow you to the mythology section.”
He what.
Chongyun didn’t notice when that smile turned into a smirk, but when he did, it was over.
That was as far as Chongyun’s memories could go whenever he tried to recall the fateful meeting between him and Xingqiu.
Fortunately, Xingqiu remembered what happened after that point quite well.
He didn’t know what was happening at the time, so at first, he met the new Chongyun with mostly confusion. Something along the lines of “who is this Chongyun and what happened to the other one that I just met?”, that sort of thing. A natural reaction, if you asked Xingqiu. Chongyun probably would have agreed if he were in Xingqiu’s shoes, but that wasn’t something Xingqiu knew for sure and it wasn’t like he had any plans on telling Chongyun what he missed.
It started out with a bit of a play fight made much more dangerous by the setting, before an even more dangerous challenge posed by Xingqiu. Xingqiu wouldn’t even call it play fighting; to him, it was more like Chongyun’s alter ego randomly swinging a weapon far too big for his own good around while Xingqiu either dodged or blocked with his own sword. Nope, definitely wasn’t a fight. In order to stop the terrible swordsmanship, Xingqiu suggested that they race each other down the mountain, to which he wasn’t expecting Chongyun to fling himself off the mountain.
Good thing one of them had the foresight to bring a glider. It wasn’t Chongyun, that was for certain. The following catch by Xingqiu and the undignified flailing from Chongyun was not at all romantic, but Xingqiu still thought it was funny, even to this day. (It was even funnier to deprive Chongyun of an explanation. Xingqiu admitted that Chongyun’s pouts when he did refuse to tell what happened were cute.)
It wasn’t until after he managed to, ah, escort Chongyun back to his clan’s home and wait for him to wake up that he got a proper explanation, disclaimer, and warning from Chongyun. After that, Xingqiu went back home, not telling a single soul what happened to him in his “moment of solitude”.
The secret of having found his soulmate was too good to give away.