2021/10/21 #poetry Nick Wilson is so unbelievably toxic. It is unfathomable. I should be glad. There would be no wonderful people if there were no despicable people. No people who light up the room if not for people who somber the mood. I don't mean to cast shade upon him. It's not that I take issue with his existence or resent him for his behavior. I don't disparage him unfairly, there is consensus among many people who know him that he exudes quite the unsavory character. I've even defended him at times. He has undoubtedly gone through his own share of discomfort, even if he does most of it to himself. There was a point in time when he got sick. Deathly ill. On the brink. Hospitalized for months. Salmonella or some such. In the building he manages things were relatively peaceful in his absence and proceeded along somewhat better without him, from what I heard and saw. When he came back, and this is the point that is interesting, he had lost around 100lbs of weight and looked great. He seemed happy. He actually smiled. One could be in the room with him and not feel slightly choked. Sometimes he would say something polite and you might actually feel good. Time passed though. He gained weight back. The lightness left. As before, he still says polite words when it would be appropriate, but now his tone makes it feel like you've been hit. This is a skill that he took decades to develop, and it shows. I do well know that change is possible. I also know that we, and our habits, are products of our environment. Still, foreknowledge or not, seeing it firsthand is inspiring, even when it goes both ways.