2021/4/25 #poetry 'Begin something new' it says A whole book with pithy sayings and illustrations not subtle meant to excite to inspire you to start to begin It looked cool, fun, and yes inspiring So I pulled it out of the box and took it home
But starting isn't my issue I've got no problem starting something new I need a book that says 'Begin again' 'Continue where you left off' 'Keep going, just like yesterday' There's probably a book like that out there but it wouldn't help I don't need inspiration or determination and certainly not self flagellation nor commitment nor merely a good plan to get myself to actually follow through and finish what I started before
Really, what would be best is if the book ate all the others if it only left the one that I needed on the shelf and if it removed my access to all the other things that weren't relevant to my task so that the only way out of boredom was not starting something new but restarting what still needed finishing
It probably wouldn't matter I'd turn the last remaining book upside down and practice reading that way then I'd see if I could turn the pages with my breath alone see if I could guess what page I was about to open to but then end up just reveling in the sound made from snapping the pages shut Snap Snap Snap until I decided that really I must not have been interested in doing this thing at all in the first place that I really don't want to do it after all and that now I will officially give up on it so that, you know, I can again be allowed to start something new