How To Be

Introduction The imagined roots of this project extend deep into my past. I am writing this in 2023. I am editing this in January 2024. My first experience with debilitating depression was in 1991. (Well... that was the first time as an adult. I will dig deeper into childhood eventually.) I began regular therapy and picked up a few diagnoses. I changed how I saw myself, and I have continued to change how I see myself.

In Netflix's animation of depression Bojack Horseman, the character Diane wants to channel all her past mental struggles into a written work that justifies it (wc). [1] That's what this is for me. Or that's what it was in the 1990s when I planted those imagined roots. That project was to be titled How To Be Depressed: A Self-Help Memoir. Nowadays I do not identify as depressed. This project is tentatively How To Be, divided into two parts: How To Be Depressed & How To Be Happy.

We'll see!

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Endnotes
1. (wc) I have decided to keep things moving by not lingering over word choices. When I find myself stuck on particular phrasing for too long I'm going to insert (wc) and keep writing. Later I can search for the wc's to replace.

I'm sure that there are other ways to arrive at being depressed. The following is what worked for me.

In this section I plan to—without getting too morose—explore the circumstances and dysfunctional thoughts that I perceive as causing emotional difficulties. Topics that may be covered include family, religious upbringing, conservatism, sexuality, the state of upper middle class US whiteness, education, employment, alienation, and health care.

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※ — below this symbol I keep scraps removed, not yet committed to, etc.

obstructed my contributed to the mental health