I wanted to be anonymous and be a force for good. Or at least make people realize how bad porn is for their life, etc.
The truth is we are not always what we think we are. I always thought I was a good person, feminist, etc.
I always struggled with porn. It compounded my personal problems. Anxiety, Social skills, Dating, Love, Satisfaction, Empathy, etc. There were many problems with all of my relationships from friends, family, etc. I have been fighting my own battle from at least 2018. It has also made me weak.
There was some thread in Reddit about porn. I don't know what it was about. But from there I learned about the porn industry. Watched a few videos in YouTube. Read from antipornography, femaledatingstrategy(a subreddit that once existed), pornismisogyny, pornhateswomen, etc. I also learn more from a few TED talks on porn. Was it porn problem? Not sure.
The truth is I wanted to be like an anonymous knight shining armor. Fighting for women, etc. But the reality is that I am just fighting for myself to get out of porn addiction. But I still do think it is useful to learn about the industry that we spend so many hours and give views, demand, etc as porn watchers/ addicts.
Some people say that guilt is not the best emotion, etc. But it need not be guilt, I mean after hearing a popular person crying about how bad it was I have never been able to watch that person. Of course I am not saying that you need something like this for every person(I am deliberately using person instead of star, I don't know why). But it does make me feel human. You too can become more humane, I believe. Reading Andrea Dworkin quotes, Robert Jensen writing, watching Gail Dines videos may change you for the better.
I still would like a world where there is no porn not because of due to no demands, a better culture than porn culture, etc.
I am just as gullible as any other person. I always thought supporting sex works is better because it was better than it becoming underground or something, etc. I never thought more than that.
I am active in the following communities: r/pornfree r/antipornography r/loveafterporn r/pornismisogyny