Apr 1

#arthur Scheduling final few therapy sessions w Arthur. Felt sad

Apr 3

#mum seemed like a chaotic dream, I even moved my arm and shouted a little to fight with my mum in dream.

Apr 4

#T Was having the final few therapy sessions with Ming. I asked her if I can see Arthur or possibly have a session with him before I terminate therapy, but she said no, and also Arthur's office was at a different location from them (Arthur's in Yau Tsim Mong district but we are currently in HK island). So she refused to let me book or meet Arthur for that reason...

Apr 5

Complicated dream but forgot. Seems it was about Arthur again

Apr 7

#mum #dad Long dream. Travelled to Japan with family, and during one of the days I scheduled to meet two online friends (no such person irl). We met up on the streets and crossed the lights and planned to shop together in a big shopping mall. Afterwards, there was quickly sunset and started raining too. The street was dark but there were street lights so it wasn't too bad. The reflections from the rain on the road was particularly memorable- maybe it felt kind of dangerous. I was wary of the pedestrians walking past us, some seemed malicious but luckily I had my friends around me. We went to a KFC to have mashed potatoes and I ate two cups of that.

Overrun session w Arthur n he was annoyed

Apr 8

I started the dream with the scene that I was in therapy and it was almost ending time (like 5 minutes remaining). Then I suddenly remembered I needed to give diary to Arthur for him to read, so I immediately took it out from my bag and handed it to him. He was annoyed. We ran overtime (it started at 11am and it went on until 12:30) because of that. I was lowkey surprised he didn't ask me to bring it next time and conclude the session when time was up. But I am also happy he overran. At 12:30 when we were really ending, I didn't want to leave. He scolded me I was like an infant (I inferred it as being clingy and occupying space without much use). He also flipped through my poorly done past papers and told me to 檢討自己 (reflect on myself). (The marks were like 0.5 marks total for the whole exam. They were terribly done.) Anyways he was not pleased with me.

Later, I went downtown as I needed to find lunch with a dream friend. We were in a foreign city that felt very Indian (chaotic and the currency is foreign. The food looks quite middle east Asian too) (or Sri Lanka? Malaysia??) We entered a very high class local shopping mall/ outlet. Although it was high class there, it was just at mediocre standard tbf. We had a time limit for lunch, so we walked everywhere in the outlet to find restaurants that were affordable and clean enough. After a long time of walking around, we finally found a little dessert/ cafe that was doing a discount for macarons and tea set. So I got a macaron.

Sleep study mandatory giant tattoo

Apr 11

I just did a sleep study and was lying on a hospital bed listening to a surgeon/ doctor telling me about my current condition. He told me I require a more in-depth study, and it needed to be an open chest surgery. It would leave a clamshell scar and a mandatory giant tattoo: in the front, there would be two giant bold “tire line” (just like the tire marks on the road). At the back, there was a super MK (edgy teenager) 左青龍右白虎 decoration (left shoulder giant Chinese dragon and right shoulder a white tiger), and in the middle, there would be a BIG italic gothic font of [my name]. I tried to bargain with the surgeon not to tattoo for quite some time, but he said it was mandatory. So I sadly gave up the in-depth sleep test. Later, I went to an anniversary celebratory event hosted by the devs in Forest app. While everyone was mingling in the dark room holding champagnes, I spotted Arthur entering the room. Then the devs told everyone to take a seat (the seats were arranged all by the four walls), so I immediately took the seat right next to him. Then his wife entered the room, and took the seat opposite to us (at the opposite wall). So I couldn't/ didn't dare to act out anything reckless/ advancing.

Apr 13

Seemed big dreams but couldn't remember

car cliff jumping

Apr 14

I was watching myself/ a person sitting in a car in third person, being driven on the hill (around the cliffs in circles). The ground was in quite plain colours and I couldn't see any scenery outside, it was very foggy. Quite minecraft vibe too, as in everything feels quite cuboid. Suddenly, the driver drove off the cliff and the car landed on the road under us. And this happened for multiple times. Although we were unscathed, the sudden loss of gravity made me very anxious. I hate this dream. Later I was filling up my old diary and therapy logs (in dream).

Apr 15

#pblmate dreamt monica changed name into a very westerner name + surname.

Apr 16

#primschool Travelled to Japan with Benson and Henry. Went to an art fair complex and bought many postcards from an animation studio. I wished to buy more but they had a purchase limit. Then, I met Chloe (the one who drew very nicely) + another primary school friend (but I forgot), and we were waiting for the train from Lo Wu back home.

Apr 17

many dreams. One line stuck with me, it was mum scolding me and the sentence was something like “你唔想上[某英文補習社]，咁你唔好學啦！”

One second late for school, crush on random guys

Apr 18

#exchange #ruby I was late to primary school/ secondary school by ONE second! I was running all across the district for my school and across roads, and I stepped into the gate of the school just as the school bell rang. A discipline teacher scolded me. I was so unhappy I woke up and also felt a bit of short of breath + palpitation so I had to lean on one side.

Second dream. I was waiting for the MTR at admiralty/ central. Ruby cosplayed as 沈星回 and stood beside me. _{(I suspect it was because I saw a giant paper decoration of that game character the night before in a shop)} I also had a crush on Victor Li somehow in the dream. huh ??? Anyways. They (I forgot who was the one) touched my body and used a deep voice to talk to me so I was very aroused. We watched a movie in a cinema, and went to an amusement park nearby together. I came across some friends I made in Cardiff and other uni friends. One asked me about my allowance and expenditure when I was in Cardiff before. Also randomly I realised I forgot to do my math homework from high school and it was overdue and I felt guilty.

Third dream. I went to a DIY workshop shop with Monica and another person (not sure if it was Yuki in the dream), and one of the staff there discriminated us for speaking English/ being a foreigner. So the other day (like one “in-dream day”) I headed out to find the staff and scolded her in front of other customers loudly multiple times.

Apr 19

I went to school and the current task was to fill in a worksheet in Chinese. It wrote a term in Chinese, and I suspected it was Parkinson's Disease. It required me to write the symptoms of this disease, but I mixed up with Alzheimers, so I kept writing down the answers for Alzheimers. Luckily before handing in, I corrected it to the answers for Parkinsons. I felt very proud. (Although after waking up I realised it was asking about Wolff-Parkinson-White Syndrome...)

secretly dating a guy

Apr 21

I was shopping in the mall with a young boy. It felt like I was dating secretly. (If I really need to say who it was similar to, I guess the vibe was like Matthew L since the dream guy and I were at similar heights in dream.) We met Dad in the mall. Luckily he did not suspect anything and didn't find out about it. Later I joined a Minecraft server, and I became friends with one of the helpers. He was friendly, but almost kicked me out when I tried a slash command (something like /tp spawnpoint), and I appeared outside of the map. He suspected if I was hacking because it was impossible to be out of the map. I explained I tried the command since usually such commands work in servers to be teleported back to the hub, but somehow in this server I was teleported outside, maybe it was mistakenly set there. So he didn't kick me out.

Next scene, I was flipping my diary book and showing Arthur the food photos I stuck to the many pages. As I was sharing happily, I heard my irl phone notifs going off and I sprang awake as I realised I was late for school. _{(And I got scolded irl bruh. Echoed across the corridor. I don't think it was necessary in university level, I either show up or I don't... My presence would )}

Apr 22-24

_{Very messy dreams I was too busy to remember or else I would get scolded for being ate again. I don't understand why admins were making themselves a big deal, just mark me late bro.}

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self-harm talk w therapist n friends

#T #arthur #pblmate #charlottec #mum

In master bedroom of old home Mum wanted to drag me out of bed to have lunch Me hugging blanket and didn’t want to Leg was a bit painful and itchy from her pull and poking I finally used my foot and pushed her out of room and locked the door I checked my legs and were full of red tiny scratches I sat by the window and looked down (just look, no suicidal ideation) I phoned the office and chatted with Ming

I got down and met up with Alex and Monica where we go for a walk, and we also met Ming We walked tgt and they chatted with me Monica shows me her healing/ healed scars on her forearm and I took a close look. _{(I suspect this triggered me and I was in a terrible mood for the whole day and relapsed)}

When we were returning and after crossing a street we found a little pop up booth distributing candies by the brand of Orange. We got our packs of candies and I started eating. (Actually the candies looked like pills and I feel like as if I am overdosing.) Arthur walked to the booth as well in an orange tshirt, I laughed at him for the orange tshirt but I didn’t tell him it was because he looked like a mannings employee. He was chill and just shrugged lol.

Walking back I received messages in a WhatsApp group chat of me, Charlotte C and Monica. Monica wanted to self harm. So I shared some reasons of why I didn’t want to and methods I used when the urges come, hopefully she can try them out or develop more of her own.

me as babyish newbie at office

Wore pajamas and carrying piles of stuff in a very clunky manner to my new seat. Everyone was wearing suits and working elegantly in this gigantic office, almost the size of one floor of shopping mall.

I was moving my stuff and saw a vibrator on the floor, it was mine but I didn’t dare to pick it up or else they know it would be mine. I felt awkward walking by in my pink pajamas and seeing that pink vibrator bc it made it obvious that it’s mine

Anyways after moving my piles of machines..?? I went back to the spot and the vibrator disappeared. Later people were gossipping about the mysterious vibrator, who brought their vibrator to work and who was so horny. Alex also brought up this topic to me and I told him it was actually mine lmao.

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meeting wellness team at dining hall; arthur pacifying me after A's provocation

#arthur #T #A

The dining hall is connected to a big supermarket, you need to get pass the supermarket in order to get to where the tables are.

On the way I saw the wellness team walking by, seems like they are having some things going on here (like a booth)

Walked back to wander in the supermarket, when I saw A. I ignored her but I heard she called me. [my name], she called nicely. I turned and saw she holding a piece of patterned clothes thingy, but I can't see clearly because I don't have my glasses. She said, this is for you (sth like that), I think you would like it. I said thanks, and then I stepped closer to see what it was, it was newborn baby clothes. So I continued, but maybe you need it more, how about keeping this for yourself? And then I left

I was very scared if she would be following me so I was looking around vigilantly since then. I was almost there at the dining hall when I encountered A, but I decided to turn back with a different route to find wellness team. I got past the cashier and back to where they were setting up stuff previously. I saw Vincci and Ruth passing by. Ruth had earlobe earrings and I looked closer and saw she actually had 5 piercings on her right ear, and also she had some makeup (black sparkly eyeshadow!!!) on and she looked super hot, and I was breathing heavily haha. But anyways Arthur wasn't here so I walked back to the dining hall where supposedly the rest of the team is meeting schoolmates for briefing/ reg day stuff whatever

I was back and I saw Billy and another lady's table, I originally wanted to go there because at least they are counsellors and are ready, but their table is full, I was creeping and walking alertly the whole time as I was really scared of seeing A. But then they noticed me and pointed me to another table, where I found Arthur and another few unknown therapists are there. There were only a few seats left (I saw monika in one of the seats and some of my younger high school schoolmates on other seats), Arthur was talking to an old man with grey hair, perhaps an invited guest, and I took the remaining empty seat next to an unknown therapist. The unknown therapist seemed to left her bag and left, when I was looking at Arthur.

I guess Arthur saw my troubled face and he came to chat with me. He stood at the back of my chair and I guess he wanted to ask me how I was doing, but the schoolmates were already crowding around me chatting about their issues or whatever, so it wasn't convenient for me and Arthur to have a private chat. Arthur put his hands on my shoulder and I felt very hot and a bit physically thrilled in a pleasant way. But I was still jolty and looking for signs of A. Arthur put his left finger on my lips but I was scared people would see this happening because it wasn't supposed to, so I tried to turn to my right as it was closer to the wall. But he continued touching my lips when I turned back. He also put his finger within my lips and I felt i was beyond wet and weak now. Very intense but seemed the crowd of schoolmates didn't notice our intimacy. And I was still jumpy whenever I see someone who seemed like A in my line of sight. So I wasn't fully in the mood for such intimate actions but I sorta enjoyed it (didn't get wet or really aroused irl this time tho, I just had raised heart beat and feeling flustered) _{(I think I imagined this because I saw a super hot gif *nsfw? of a girl sucking a man's finger on tumblr and I was imagining that as Arthur's hand yesterday)}

school bus adventure on way home

#cecilia #uni #6grass

• nanny van with the auntie from me when I was Primary six

• ordering lunch boxes on van but no one wanted the salmon with white broth (white broth is not yummy irl)– the one sitting next to me asked don't you like salmon lol, I say not with this lunch set

• Went to centennial campus Lg floor/ or did we go separately? We had a lecture and after class me and a few friends like Vienne, and Monika were wearing green gown and discussing where to eat lunch.

• went to a big building as a middle resting point. We were playing in one of the toilets upstairs and cecilia find me making jokes a littttle bit suggestive so she pushed me out of the toilet for fun (we had fun), and then I went to the staircase to check at the irl time with my irl apple watch and found it's time to go to school so now im typing this

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halted session w vincci; intimate with Arthur 2

#T #arthur my new session would be with Vincci instead, and it would be conducted over zoom. It would be my first time having a session with her. Arthur was a little bit worried if she can handle the session, so he joined the zoom meeting as an observer too. But around the mid part of the session, while Vincci was speaking, she suddenly quitted the zoom. I assumed it might be some internet issues of her. But she didn't rejoin. I was confused and initially I was a bit hopeful, so I was joking with Arthur about the situation. But after 10 mins of her not appearing, Arthur decided to call her but she didn't pick up her phone. Around 20 mins of waiting and almost the end of the session I was kinda upset because I think she didn't want to see me so she disappeared. I also told Arthur about me being a bit unhappy. I also felt a bit empty in the dream. Thinking back it might be because I felt like both Vincci and Arthur didn't want me (Arthur referring me to Vincci and she just ditched the session) and I felt abandoned.

I forgot how the scenes changed, but I was still in my new house bedroom/ old house parent's bedroom (direction of bed and door were similar), when I finished the zoom. Then Arthur came into the room. (I think) (The parts below were blurry) He lied on the bed and I was on top of him. We were naked this time. I was again humping him. (I couldn't really recall the sensations I had after I woke up- but I did moan a lot in dream) I leaned forward and our chests touched. Then I gave him a hickey on the left side of his neck. _{(shit now I googled it, I actually gave him a bite with my right canine... LMFAO)} He also gave one on my left neck (not sure bite or hickey), and as I felt that light sharp pain I was quite aroused and moaned again haha

I continued humping him while (we kissed? I think) Until I was kinda wet and I can also feel his cock erected and was rubbing against my butt as I moved myself. Then we changed position as he stood at my back and teased me by rubbing it without putting it in. Finally he put it in. Honestly it just felt like a foreign body inside and it wasn't really arousing haha- but interesting experience

_{After I woke up, the sensations in the dream are much less vivid to recall than the first dream (except the “hickey/ bite”)– so it was just pleasant watching but not feeling. I'm not sure if I felt a lot while dreaming though.}

prepping high school final exam in y4

#secschool school distributed papers to us for practice I got mine and I ran to school (my old home) in order to scold my f6 eng teacher for giving me an ass SBA mark but I arrived at school just when the recess bell rang (:35) (aka recess ended), so I didn't continue my plan

walk two dogs

#mum Mum led two dogs into my bedroom, telling me to walk them later. I was putting on the collar and leash for them but I forgot which collar is for which dog, and I took some time to attach them when eventually I realised I swapped them. Mum came in and helped me reattached the collars and leashes swiftly- but she reattached the ones I was meaning to remove. So I told her no, this is wrong and we need to change it. She replied they are similar, then you swap by yourself, and she left the room. I figured it out by a while and was halfway done, but seemed she waited a while already and she was a bit impatient so she came back into the room and helped me with it. I felt happy. Then we were about to go out and walk the dogs.

_{(...... now I am feeling mixed)}

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terrible gigantic argument with mum at wellness team waiting room

#T #mum #secschool

It is my birthday today. I felt a bit bad so I went to sit in the wellness team office. The waiting room was spacious. It was actually a big computer room. I sat there for a long time but couldn’t pacify myself, and my trembles continued, and I was still crying. So Vincci came and check on me. And she gave me a notebook to write what kind of subjects I chose during secondary school. So I listed all 13 from junior high and 7 in senior high. We carried this book with us to our uni entrance, and we sat at the middle of the slope where everyone would walk down to exit school. Ashley walked by and gave me a jellycat peanut keychain as a birthday present. She wished me happy birthday. Then I recalled (knew about in the dream that) it was my birthday. I was very thankful of her for remembering and the birthday wishes and I bursted into tears again. Some other old secondary classmates who also walked by said hi to me. After a quick while Ashley came back and apologetically took away my gift (which weirdly became a white plushy rather than the peanut), saying that she had recognised me wrongly and gifted wrongly. Still crying from receiving the gift, I was a bit sad but thought to myself that it wasn’t a big deal to be sad about yet I sobbed.

I think we went to a supermarket afterwards to check out on desserts yogurt and ice cream. _{(irl yogurt is my mum’s favourite and I’d pick ice cream.)}

Vincci was still next to me and we went back to the waiting room. My mum came to the room as she found out somehow that I would be here. Probably she checked my geolocation or she saw my notebooks, which I was deliberately not writing about therapy most of the time. When she saw me, she looked crossed, but when she saw Vincci beside me, she rose from the stool and put up a smiley face full of gratitude and thank her for taking care of me. I was angry and loudly told her to stop being so fake and put on a show when she dislike student wellness team _{(idk if she does irl but very likely, if she knows about it)}. So she scolded me back for wasting time talking to strangers and trusting them. That I was a total letdown and I couldn’t even study properly. I was furious and upset so I also stood and yelled at her telling her that she didn’t even understand how come my study is so bad, she never asked about my mental health and she ignored all the issues that I presented at home and those I told her about. She knew that my mind was so bad I was lost at school. I couldn’t even recall important stuff about myself. That I was in my room abnormally moody and I only showered every five days. I was yelling at her and getting very irritated every day and I never smiled but she didn’t even think anything beyond that! She only cared about the results I bring forward. But it was never me.

When she heard me yelling and screaming at her, it triggered her and she also yelled back with such explosive temper like usual.

At the midst of our argument, I also yelled at Vincci in frustration to see how me and my mum are both double-faced with such dramatic emotions. (To clarify the loudness is simply because I was arguing and I wouldn’t randomly speak in a low tone to another person. Not that I have beef with Vincci)

I’m too tired to write down our arguments, and I couldn’t remember them anyway. But we had a terrible big loud argument and my voice was coarse again. But it still did not reach her.

_{Maybe Arthur is right about I shouldn’t be expecting from my parents as we knew how they’re like. But I am lonely in this little place which is supposedly home.}

post exam driving

#uni

During exchange, I went to a distant place to have an exam, so a prof drove me there. On the way back I drove a part of the highway back with my riolu on my lap, and Cecot in backseat lol. But I got distracted by it after a pause of waiting other cars to pass- as in I forgot to start driving again and I became too focused on my doll. So Cecot said he would drive it and I sit at the back. Reluctantly (because I like driving), we swapped seats. When we reached the urban streets, I asked if I could try to drive. He said “you need more experience to handle the road.” I’m like ok Then I asked “how can I train my attention as I couldn’t see the rest of my vision if I look at the lane in front of me,” He replied, “by training.” I was left speechless because he wasn’t answering me. Maybe he was annoyed by my previous mistake of not focusing on the road. But I asked, “training?” in hopes of clarification. And he said “yes.” … so I asked “what kinds of training?” I think he was planning to answer, but at this point he already arrived at a parking spot and I had to get off. He asked me, “is it over?” (This part starting was all in canto) I asked “what do you mean by it, if you’re talking about my module then I completed it, if you’re talking about the exam then yeah?” And he repeated, “is it over?”

So I was very confused and kept thinking what’s over until I woke up.

But now after typing this down I realised he just probably wanted me to end the conversation.

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bpd diagnosis discussion among wellness team

#arthur #ruth #t

I was listening to a talk about exchanging to overseas universities in the common area in my dorm with a dream guy friend (not irl)

(there was a university called ... tomato university in canada... and the girl who was tryna promote the uni was wearing a tomato mascot outfit... oml)

Anyway, the guy friend left right before the talk ends, and I helped him collect his handouts and worksheets and I looked back and saw Arthur sitting kinda diagonally behind me, using his phone. I looked at the screen and saw my emails (not irl) with him. (using outlook) The content of the emails were all conversations I had during the session. I asked him what that was, and he swapped to whatsapp and showed me a whatsapp group where he sent all our conversations out. He explained he kept the emails and forwarded them to a group with the rest of the wellness team, and this group is specifically to monitor? my behaviour through discussing about my words with him. (sentences with the vibe like I'm never gonna leave you/ just you/ previous “arguments”/ sentences about I like him a lot) I was checking the whatsapp group members but I couldn't recognise the people, as they are using their default names (not phone numbers nor contact numbers) which were all nicknames. But apparently that's the team. The group chat was kinda quiet though. Just him sending out the convos and occasionally someone would reply briefly. I suspect they were discussing in person.

Arthur admitted slowly but frankly that he thought I was a bit borderline, to which I said it's ok cuz I felt I was kinda this too. And I felt a bit recognised because I haven't had a definite answer from him before. But internally I was also slightly upset because they think I have such a condition.

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peer supporter event, eat delicious meal; “free” meal from delivery man

#T

vincci was busy i was leading some primary school kids along with other peer supporters their school lift was small tried going into lift to 4/f but other taller primary school kids with bigger furniture went to 6/F first

then we finally arrived our floor, where they invited a gov funded eng teacher? speech therapist? to come teach some other organisers include our counsellors then we had a very very very very delicious indonesian meal so delicious i tried opening and closing eyes to confirm if it was real life or dream, but confirmed it was real life ... it was dream

so yummy

anyways later i went to a fast food shop for beef rice like 吉野家 but the chef preparing meal was very busy, and the cashier as well, and i sort of avoided the counsellors cuz i don't want to explain why i want food and then a delivery guy walked by and saw me waiting, so he went to the chef/ food window and help me get a big big big box of beef rice it was $16.xx, I asked him if he has payme, he said it's just 16 dollars (no need), and i said I have payme qr code if he wanted to scan, and he didn't and waved goodbye

delivery fee increased

i was trying to return my jeans cuz taobao shop delivered wrongly (bruh) (irl) and i found this person who can carry it to mainland to deliver back, which would be cheaper than going from hk directly

then in the dream he raised the price from 3x to 4x and i was a bit annoyed

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archery fair

#mum #dad Archery fair was rather interesting. It was a semi-open space, where various booths were set up for people to enjoy or have a taste of archery. I queued up in one of the booths, and when it was my turn, the archery fair ended and everyone began to pack their stuff. So I walked around with the sample bow and arrow and played with it. I was kind of happy to be able to get these on hand to sort of use it, despite the target board was already being taken down and tidied up.

At the mean time, I tried to hide from parents after the archery fair to prevent them from finding me to grab me back to hotel with them.

news about Ruth the cat-shaped jade pendant being eaten

On the way to the hotel, I listened to the news. There was a news about a jade pendant missing and its fragments were found in the recycling bin. The man who owned the pendant, and his wife, were both troubled by it as they didn't know why would the pendant be like that, and this jade was rather important to him I think, cuz he named his cat-shaped jade (as Ruth) (lmao) and wears it every day? Eventually after investigation, the staff/ police found out that someone chewed and eaten the jade, and left some shards in the bin.

changing hotel room, potentially gross hotel room

#T The hotel room me and my family was allocated was pretty decent, but during our stay in the second day, mum told me Dad was going to ask the hotel to switch to another hotel room which had the same shape as the one we invited Aunt Helen to live in before. For me I didn't think it was necessary, so I was a bit annoyed. I also heard from others (Vincci... so random) that some of the rooms were very gross and oily and dark so I thought if we changed rooms maybe the new room would be worse.

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Murder

There was a kid (twins), whose family owned a ship. One of them invited a friend to come. The friend secretly climbed and on board the ship at night without them knowing, before the actual invitation day. He got on in a place with security mechanisms. A robot chopped off his head. Then there was an automatic dispenser system on the ship, where they release the kid’s body along with a lot of fish snacks and lure in order to facilitate the body being broken down and eaten by fishes, so that the body would be gone. Actually the security system was for assassinating the other twin, with a seemingly valid reason of him being sneaky and thought he would be an intruder instead and auto killed sus people.

classmate became eng teacher

#secschool #pblmate Setting is like on an aircraft, I’m on the middle columns. Watching Pokemon Horizons on iPad, and started to play static noises instead. I realised it was a bit too loud as I was using the speaker, so I turned it down to not affect others. I was a bit embarrassed because I wasn’t aware of that when I was watching the show.

Later the teacher came for class. It was actually Serene, teaching English. Meanwhile our classmates and I were actually in the same year as her (still secondary school in dream) but she’s already employed by the school. I was like wow how come Anyways we started checking and marking our worksheets (marked but we needed to listen for the correct answer for questions we got wrong)

Also the setting/ room slowly got warped into a high school classroom.

I was on a single table, vs others with two tables together. The classmate in front of me was also on a single table. I saw her moving her table backwards a little bit, so I wanted to move my table with her. But as I was moving to the front, she moved the table a bit sideways to join a double table. I was slightly shocked and ngl a little bit sad, lol And then Audrey came and sit on my another side. We chatted and I kind of did a show and tell with my pencil case. It was cute and in pastel green (hmm not gonna buy this colour irl probably). Yay! We were checking a section of the worksheet which I left it blank. I recalled it was actually because I got to school late, so I missed it, but it was fine. I wasn’t too bothered by it. The classmate who moved away joined us. So now we are sitting in a triple manner. Yay!

Later Serene started to chit chat with the class instead of teaching new stuff. She asked if any of us have part time jobs. Around 6 out of 35? Students raised their hands. She went around and asked everyone. Emma and her friend were tutoring Spanish, interesting.

Narita airport harbour view

#arthur #T (I think there was Ming and Urshmar) #mum Walking out of the observation deck thing but by the harbour, I was mesmerised by how BLUE the sky and the water were. The sky was in a brilliant bright royal blue with absolutely no clouds. The water was shimmering and in a darker shade of navy blue. I couldn’t take my eyes off the beautiful scene.

Following me were Arthur and a few others, and my mum. We were finding a spot to take a rest as the deck was kinda crowded with mainland tourists.

Mum told me to look at the scenery and not to be on my phone. She urged me to go down one step and be closer to the water. Despite knowing how to swim, I was scared as I was just wearing casual wear. And I’m not sure if the water would be safe enough. i didn’t know how deep the water is, and there wasn’t any lifeguards nor buoys. She said, it would be fine, you won’t fall over, trust me. _{(oh but my mum doesn’t know how to swim, bruh how are you sure it would be fine I can’t trust you)} So I stepped one step down and I’m slightly touching the water. It was pretty fun. Finally I initiated to take a selfie together, mainly because I wanted a photo in which Arthur was with me. Took a few tries. Idk how it turned out. And in the dream I got to learn that they’re all living in the same block of building, and

… i got distracted and forgot what I was gonna type

Anyways opposite across the harbour was west kowloon & kai tak, and I realised Narita airport was closer than I expected ! Lol

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workshops with Ts; man-eating bird, visiting new home

#arthur #T #ivan #dad A hot dry sunny afternoon Leaving Sydney mtr station (literally a station called “sydney” lol) Wearing my small bra背心 like yesterday About to head to school although I’m already about to be late

Signing up for many psyc workshops and courses

Just to see if I can catch the team esp Arthur I saw him multiple times _{(i forgot the details!)}, I was happy. One time I tried to spook him again but I accidentally spooked angela. Theyre both wearing light brown coats, but Angela’s was lighter in colour.

Using annotated worksheets to prove my presence cuz I chose to sit alone in another spot and I didn’t sign my attendance before The guest speaker was pretty chill. Vincci vibe but the speaker was a relatively middle aged/ old male.

After workshop me and other classmates were oil painting over already colour printed posters with around the same colour. It felt pointless so I decided to add some textures and lines within the blocks of colours to give them more style..

Also between workshops: Ivan gave me Arthur’s shared work onedrive for their project (in the dream they’re working on one project) One onedrive folder was named sth like “research work dev” and inside was a 50+ page of a document typed by Arthur about how he managed to met his wife and developed their relationship I wanted to read and i only read the first paragraph about how they were secondary school classmates and at that time another male classmate was after his wife and Arthur was salty? About it Lol (dream only !!)

Later the dream was about how there was a kind of bird mutated and would eat humans. Named the “man-eating bird”. At first I was looking at the sparrows on the ground trying to see what it looked like. So I kept sussing normal birds. But later a bigger yellow bird arrived and started to tear other birds into shreds. It looked like a medium sized fat parrot actually.

And then I hid in a small home. There was a mini garden with double doors, to make people who water their plants to disinfect and kill the bugs that came along before reentering the home. A lady cleaned. But left all the doors open. So I closed it. I was sitting at a small corner waiting for nothing, I was just bored. Seemed like there’s a famous dude with long headings who’s gonna come and organise a talk in the room by the door. (The headings was just like Arthur’s but like in the dream I recognised it as my Dad)

Later i kept sitting there and i heard more people entering that room (I cant see the entrance from where I was sitting) And then I heard a person who was not entering. He’s walking further into the home, and I looked to see who’s alike with me (cuz I walked further into the floor to other rooms for my psyc workshops too at the beginning of the dream, although these workshops are slightly different, this is not a workshop that wellness team invites guest to come and speak, this one was the host’s own talk)

And I saw my Dad’s face. We both “oi?”, (pleasantly) surprised why each other was here.

And then my dad brought me deeper into the house. And I realised the whole initial part is just the door entrance area (玄關), and inside was a huuuuge activity room (mum and dad’s bedroom) with larrrrge windows and seaview, also a playground downstairs outside the window. Reminded me of Lohas park. Also colourful toys and playmats in the room. Maybe it was multipurposed for play therapy?? So fun And I was a bit guilty because I hadn’t stepped foot into this room despite they had been inviting me before.

Anyways yayayaayay

_{side note: actually I had dreams in the past few days, but then it wasn’t really easy to recall + it was boring, like I dreamt of fictional aunts gathered around me. Thats boring so I didn’t bother to recall LOL}

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