Previous suicide attempt (dream)

#ivan

I was on a school tour with uni people. We were queuing up to perform as part of an assessment for a sports class during the tour. Before assessing we have to fill in a form about our personal data. I was the last in queue. So the coach asked me to perform... first! Before performing, he asked me to come forward to double check my personal information. Other people also crowded around slightly to have a peek, because they were curious about what I wrote inside. The coach read aloud and pointed at different parts of the form as he was repeating it for me. The first blank was whether I was receiving psychologic/ psychiatric services. And how many sessions have I done. I answered honestly. The second one... He verbally repeated it... Previous suicide attempts. In the dream I wrote about one. About how I was standing by the edge of a building/ bridge at midnight and eventually someone (Ivan) spotted me and called for rescue. The rescuer took me away from the spot and I didn't die. _{(But in real life... I don't think I have really attempted it/any... idk. The emotions I felt while reading and visualising the paragraph felt pretty real though. Intense agony and hopelessness. I wish I could give a hug to that little me, but I wasn't strong enough anyways)}

I was a bit embarrassed because now people would think I look different from how I had presented myself in front of them before. It was as if I lied. I felt guilty for lying but I had to lie or else I would look different from the mentally healthy crowd. And get myself alienated. _{So I don't want to get alienated because of having weird negative vibes, but being with people that couldn't resonate with me because I didn't want to share how I was truly feeling, is me facilitating my own alienation. Sarcastic.}

I think people were kinda shocked but didn't really show it as in looking at me.

Later I started to perform. It was something like a ballet, or ice skating. I had to rotate myself and also do some stretching actions.

They were watching with respect, I think.

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very annoying mum always at my back

#mum In this dream I have a little bro and mum and also a schoolmate Mum liked to follow me EVERYWHERE i wanted to find new rooms to hide but she just always found me im so so so annoyed oh my god

I wanted to team up with little bro and schoolmate to hide from her but little bro liked to stick to mum bruh

So annoying !!!! Onl9… maybe let’s rename it to be ln9 Bruh

scary people outside home

#uni #secschool #dad

More and more strangers were crowding/ walk by my home some people that looked like young construction workers went in my home when mum didnt unlock the ftont door, just to put down random items (that mum had left before) Mum forbade me to go out, and I am scared too. Dad was also forbidding me to go.

More and more crowds were outside, and wearing weird clothings. Colourful vibrant exotic clothings, As if a 百鬼夜行 was going on. One tried to enter again. I yell at them to try to make them go away. He was just trying to return something Mum had dropped before. I thought it was lying, so I continued to try to shoo him away, but Mum told me she really had dropped this before so it was real.

I could also see Ashley and Audrey via the door hole, along with other adults. And a creepy clown. They all came from the corridor (idk where exactly because the door hole had a limited view angle), and left from another small door (not there irl) by the emergency staircase. It was really like a parade rather than staying in front of my door. And they looked happy. (happily chaotic evil???)

Idk anyways because I needed to leave for whatever reason (maybe I needed to go to school), I had to change clothes. Mum was giving unsolicited advice again, while Dad was giving me more clothes to choose from, which was fueling Mum's points and ideas. Anyways I chose a relatively original outfit despite Mum saying it was ugly and bad.

I checked the outside situation again, and there were still a lot of people outside. But looking at all the stickers and encouraging words people have left for me/ I have written myself on my bedroom door, I thought it was time to actually try to go out despite it looking scary.

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swimming, massaging friend n got dumped

#PBLmate Swimming, six people in total including me. One pair of couple (uni friends), two quiet introverted boys, me and Human. Somehow we wanted to play something more wild and spicy. So we paired ourselves up. At the entrance of different pools you are required to walk past a gate again, which detects your saliva. The couple used the man’s (and the girl would kiss the man and get his saliva in order to open the gate for herself too) I decided to do that for both of us (me and Human) But because we weren’t as familiar to that level, the kiss doesn’t work so I just left some saliva on the gate for her to come in.

The quiet boys left.

And I gave her a massage at the bottom. I didn’t penetrate the though. Just a massage. She looked relaxed and a bit aroused, meanwhile I was aroused too and making noises by her ear, which hopefully would “trigger” her more. When it was almost time to leave, I started to play with her right nipple with my tongue. She was apparently more aroused by this. I felt quite proud of myself lol When it was ending I asked for a kiss again because she probably needs it anyways for exiting the gate, not sure As soon as we kiss, I tried to use my tongue to reach into her mouth, although my tongue was dry. but she complained of my breath smell. She said it was itchy and felt fermented. She pushed me away and declared/ yelled she wouldn’t be with me again and anymore! And she walked away angrily. I felt defeated but didn’t hold her back because I was guilty for my breath. Her last sentence is she would reconsider me. So it was not too bad. But I was sad. Maybe just good massaging wasn’t enough to hold a person. _{(reminded me of my dad’s terrible rotting breath. Nah.)}

sus tree man around emperor house

#mum #dad (Now that I revisited the tag I forgot why I added my parents here. Maybe the emperor and wife are mum and dad but as I was writing I forgot)

The emperor’s friend/ wife needs help. He dialed his dad to come to “南門” (south door) His dad- big big emperor came and needs to kow tow and worship from the entrance as a tradition. But usually emperors arrive at big big entrances instead of this small “south door”, so it was wrong but he still kow tow, but the things he pray for had changed into hoping ghosts from south door wouldn’t harm them etc.

Later we saw a sus man at the bushes outside our entrance. He was wearing a lot of leaves, like those PUBG camouflage. But he was “sneakily” but kind of obviously hopping and approaching our entrance. I got scared and told everyone to go inside quickly. Emperor noticed. He hinted his father to retreat. Emperor’s pal/ wife follows the emperor, and didn’t say anything. Emperor’s father was oblivious and still praying. Anyways the sus tree guy was getting closer and closer so we all went back into the house, emperor dragged his dad in too. Well the house wall was made of glass but it’s better than nothing… still very fragile and unsafe. We got blinds on the glass walls though… still unideal.

While walking in the corridor someome told me a historical story/ myth in the house: a little girl got raped by … numbers, erm like if 123456^10000000 , then every time there is a calculation step, the person got thrusted once by the perpetrator.

Somehow in that every calculation step there was also a prize giving ceremony going on for selected pokemon trainers out there. (They were selected based on calculation results, they converted the numbers into different codes and figure out what codes correspond to what trainer and pokemon. And somehow I was one of them for my generation, along with Roy (from pokemon horizons), I think. There was one more pokemon who won in our gen, I think it was Kuwassu (i forgot the English name- the water duck starter in scarlet violet). However before the photo had taken it wasn’t ready yet and wasn’t even on scene. After taking the pic it got ready and got on. It felt very sad and disappointed. (There’s also no retaking of photos) I felt pity for it and comforted it. _{(Oh reminded me of not being in the photo for club group photos for school magazine for two years… because I was late by just a bit. I felt equally down back then.)}

aeon shopping, jpy exchange rate, hotel delivery arrangement

At Japan. I found something cool (useless kids sticker toy) in aeon I saw the prices and it was originally like 1400 yen on the tag on the hook, but on the toy there was a hkd label which says 115 hkd I thought it would be significantly cheaper in jpy, and since we were at japan, could we pay in jpy? I turned around and asked a friend nearby. He was actually still choosing stuff to buy. He said that’s a smart idea, maybe I should ask the cashier and he would like to know too. Meanwhile I was guessing maybe it’s just I couldn’t do tax refund if I pay in jpy, but it would still be cheaper than paying in hkd.

I went to the counter and saw my mum at it. Dad slightly further away, waiting by the side at the back as usual.

It was actually just a bag of items mum bought, but she requested aeon to deliver directly to the hotel since the bag was too big, but she hasn’t received it yet, and she was mad. And she’s gonna complain to the cashier.

Meanwhile I started to brainstorm: maybe they delivered to the wrong locker for the wrong room because we swapped rooms a few days in And then I quickly mentally planned, maybe she can ask the cashier for a note/ receipt of them shipping successfully to whatever locker, as a proof, and then we go to the hotel, explain to them about the wrong locker situation and get the items.

Anyways Mum started to communicate with them with broken English, she sounded mad. I just felt Mum was being stupid and unreasonable. The cashier asked her if she was the one who deliver to room 22xx. By this time I already knew it was really a wrong delivery because our old hotel room was 22xx while our updated new one was 16xx. But mum obviously hadn’t realised that, she was just head on and about to argue anything. I was fed up by this ineffective communication from her so I just went to the cashier and explained the thing in like two sentences. Actually as I was explaining, the cashier already asked me if I wanted a proof/ receipt for the hotel, so I immediately said yes, and the issue was solved. Mum exclaimed this was solved so quickly! She expected this would take much more time! I was too fed up so I didn’t explain to her. I just knew it was because she was approaching people to release her anger, argue her way out and figure out who is in the wrong and prove herself right, instead of providing ideas and discussing together, reaching consensus and solving things together (especially when these things were just oudated info and no one had actually did anything real bad)

It’s just effective communication! Just listen!

Later (quickly), the cashier also offered a big bag and a circular box because she bought something new and maybe she wanted to put this into the bag, which the later could be used outside of the delivered items bag to provide more support (like double bags u know)

Mum initially was very unhappily surprised by why the fuck we wanted such a big bag, instead of listening to the cashier. So I explained to her.

So she “wow…” in a frowning voice. Her appreciation sounds like disapproval, and the cashier seemed shocked.

I asked her immediately why she’d do that, and she claimed she was appreciative! And argued her “wow…” is happy tone. Me and dad tried to educate mum about it, but she brushed us off. Bruh again _{(reminded me of that meal with relatives and mum tried to praise an item being good, but started off with a frowning tone and face and sentence. And that worried her sis lol and then dad was explaining Mum’s always like this – mum’s sis has GAD and dad had a very jumpy and easily frightened nature……….)}

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huge argument bt me & mum

#mum Im legit yelling as hard as I can in the dream. She was very stubborn I felt very frustrated But she gave me a can of soft drinks later, so I was less furious but still angry.

proposed by unfamiliar classmate

#secschool #CCH #jamie #charlottec

Secondary school people all gathered in the hall (it was a dining hall by Vivienne Westwood??) for a special occasion. Apparently I’m gonna get proposed by a person. So I was guessing who’s the person. I almost thought it was Valerie, but I would be hesitant to accept it. And then I start thinking if it would be Jamie.

I saw the gifts they’re gonna give to me. They were commissioned drawings by really famous artists. I felt surprised and happy, but also worried because they must’ve spent a lot but I was hesitant…

Later CCH walked by to tell me it’s Joanne H. I was confused and double checked the name with her. I told CCH I didn’t really know her. CCH asked on what occasions had we met. I said EITP. CCH was confused so I explained it’s an IT extracurricular activity at school. That’s it. CCH asked if I wanted to accept the proposal. I was hesitant, and finally firmly said, no. CCH couldn’t really hide her slightly shocked face, and asked me how I would reject her. (Because the board at the hall had the names of pairs of proposed couples listed, there were like 6-7 pairs. It would be awkward if we were the only failed pair.

Meanwhile CCH walked away to ask for other teachers for advice (for me/ herself) And I’m brainstorming my script to reject Joanne. Jamie, who were on my left (in front of me in the queue), warned me she might be an NPD and she’s not gonna give up that easily.

I finished brainstorming my script and signalled CCH to come back because I got the idea. I’ll thank her first for the gifts and effort, and then I would explain we weren’t familiar with each other, so I’ll decline the proposal for now, but I’m willing to know more about her. I think that sounded appropriate! (What about the gifts! I don’t know too so I’ll leave that out of the speech.)

Anyways it’s time for all students to get up the stage. Somehow now Jamie was in front of Charlotte which was in front of me. I was locking arms with Charlotte, lol. While walking, I saw a girl holding a phone showing women rather suggestive images (but fr it’s just bikini photos… but more exposed) at the row behind us.

Interesting… 🤨

escape using pastel car

#uni After the rejection I guess (the dream didn’t show that section) I rushed to a nearby carpark. There was a man welcoming me by the gate, leading me down to the cars. He asked me embryology questions and influenza vaccination questions. I said I didn’t revise and I’ve forgotten them already, (it’s summer give me a break!) maybe I’ll revisit them when school starts. Anyways we went down to this empty carpark (no people, some cars) but occasionally there’s sounds. There were some random wild animals like skunks.

Suddenly I felt the urge to rush and hide. Seems Joanne was coming. I saw more cars suddenly turning on and steering away. I wanted to grab a car tok and I was about to grab this pastel pink? Purple car. (I have a cool dream item remote that can remote anything as I concentrate on it- exclusive to this current dream I guess) When I wanted to turn it on I noticed a car flickering its lights on me. It was a person in a car’s passenger seat. He wanted me to take the driver’s seat. The car was cuter and was the original design that I wanted to drive. It has a combination of multiple pastel colours, petite and had decorative wings on the sides? I got in and started driving. But the side mirrors were pretty bad, I can’t get them to open wide enough to see the back/ even side of my car. And the middle mirror was pretty unfair too because it leaned towards the passenger side. _{Somehow I felt unfair due to gender inequality because it was leaning towards the man’s side. But now outside dream it doesn’t really make sense. It’s just poor design.} Also it was very cramped inside. Anyways so I was driving blindly. I was planning to ask the male passenger to help me look at nearby cars, but I figured out he might have some blind spots too. So I haven’t asked.

Dream ended.

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workshops with Ts; man-eating bird, visiting new home

#arthur #T #ivan #dad A hot dry sunny afternoon Leaving Sydney mtr station (literally a station called “sydney” lol) Wearing my small bra背心 like yesterday About to head to school although I’m already about to be late

Signing up for many psyc workshops and courses

Just to see if I can catch the team esp Arthur I saw him multiple times _{(i forgot the details!)}, I was happy. One time I tried to spook him again but I accidentally spooked angela. Theyre both wearing light brown coats, but Angela’s was lighter in colour.

Using annotated worksheets to prove my presence cuz I chose to sit alone in another spot and I didn’t sign my attendance before The guest speaker was pretty chill. Vincci vibe but the speaker was a relatively middle aged/ old male.

After workshop me and other classmates were oil painting over already colour printed posters with around the same colour. It felt pointless so I decided to add some textures and lines within the blocks of colours to give them more style..

Also between workshops: Ivan gave me Arthur’s shared work onedrive for their project (in the dream they’re working on one project) One onedrive folder was named sth like “research work dev” and inside was a 50+ page of a document typed by Arthur about how he managed to met his wife and developed their relationship I wanted to read and i only read the first paragraph about how they were secondary school classmates and at that time another male classmate was after his wife and Arthur was salty? About it Lol (dream only !!)

Later the dream was about how there was a kind of bird mutated and would eat humans. Named the “man-eating bird”. At first I was looking at the sparrows on the ground trying to see what it looked like. So I kept sussing normal birds. But later a bigger yellow bird arrived and started to tear other birds into shreds. It looked like a medium sized fat parrot actually.

And then I hid in a small home. There was a mini garden with double doors, to make people who water their plants to disinfect and kill the bugs that came along before reentering the home. A lady cleaned. But left all the doors open. So I closed it. I was sitting at a small corner waiting for nothing, I was just bored. Seemed like there’s a famous dude with long headings who’s gonna come and organise a talk in the room by the door. (The headings was just like Arthur’s but like in the dream I recognised it as my Dad)

Later i kept sitting there and i heard more people entering that room (I cant see the entrance from where I was sitting) And then I heard a person who was not entering. He’s walking further into the home, and I looked to see who’s alike with me (cuz I walked further into the floor to other rooms for my psyc workshops too at the beginning of the dream, although these workshops are slightly different, this is not a workshop that wellness team invites guest to come and speak, this one was the host’s own talk)

And I saw my Dad’s face. We both “oi?”, (pleasantly) surprised why each other was here.

And then my dad brought me deeper into the house. And I realised the whole initial part is just the door entrance area (玄關), and inside was a huuuuge activity room (mum and dad’s bedroom) with larrrrge windows and seaview, also a playground downstairs outside the window. Reminded me of Lohas park. Also colourful toys and playmats in the room. Maybe it was multipurposed for play therapy?? So fun And I was a bit guilty because I hadn’t stepped foot into this room despite they had been inviting me before.

Anyways yayayaayay

_{side note: actually I had dreams in the past few days, but then it wasn’t really easy to recall + it was boring, like I dreamt of fictional aunts gathered around me. Thats boring so I didn’t bother to recall LOL}

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train; shopping design; hk tour; predatory domestic helper

#mum #dad #uni Train journey. There were 12 cars, my parents and I were going on the 8th. Our journey would take a little bit more than an hour. _{(around the duration of the last cross-city train we took)} Upon arriving at each station, the cars would separate and leaving that particular car in their respective destination. Car 1 would be the earliest to separate and so on. Pretty interesting design.

Design shopping with Yuki We were looking through minecraft pixelated textures now. (Uhm maybe imagine 3d goggles but the goggles are minecraft texture packs; some sort of AR stuff.. but we weren’t actually wearing glasses, it was inbuilt in our bodies as a function?) Yuki’s texture pack was good. As if she downloaded that “more player models” mod because everything was blocky and 3D. I tried to switch mine but all my packs were not pretty so I was viewing in an ugly colour filter.

We went to some pop up stores to look at their original designed products. But the shop keepers were unwelcoming me because I only looked and didn’t buy anything.

Raining hk Coffee shop go out (no seats) Tourist ask for directions Take bus from whampoa/ tst coast Across victoria harbour to another coast (teach tourist using map, another passerby also teach)

Ok and then on the bus there was a group of domestic helpers. One was taking a photo of me when I was sitting opposite to my own domestic helper. I snached his phone and deleted the pic.

My domestic helper was a bit chill because he was rambling on where we should have sex together in the field when he’s working. I asked him if he can pick a place that less people would look at (I was unwilling but I couldn’t escape). He avoided my question, I think he would like us to fuck in front of his friends aka those on the bus.

Before getting off I realised I forgot to clear the recently deleted album so i snatched his phone again. But his was android and he had multiple album apps. I browsed inside but couldn’t find that tab. But I had to get off the bus w my domestic helper. So I returned him his phone.

Getting off I asked my helper what’s for lunch. He said I’m cooking (me) And I asked how about we cook indomie He had an idea and entered an alley, which led to those small snacks shops. I followed auickly yet nervously.

It was actually a big alley. One fish shop and then one gambling, one sus shop

Saw Sally and Mancy I at first waved at the wrong person as Sally, it was a third person travelling along with them. (They’re all cosplaying) But Sally was surprised I recognised her. I apologised for waving at the wrong person but Sally felt close enough and was very glad and amused.

They wished me good luck when having sex with my domestic worker. I chuckled and said thanks (although i really don’t want to have) :////

And then I was planning where to get a test strip for my domestic worker for STI right before sex…

med quiz w Ronnie!

#PBLmate Med quiz in lab. Sitting with Ronnie J. Need to group tgt two people in a group. A third girl in another table ask if she can group with Ronnie. Ronnie declined. And we formed a group. I was secretly very happy hahahahahaha Did a few multiple choice questions on paper as a casual quiz. The handwritten markings got digitalized in real time, very cool.

depositing money; zombie escape, penguin and seals!

#secschool

Getting a lot of red packets from relatives. In RMB. Depositing in bank ATM. All those 100 bank notes

My savings acc rose from like 5000 to over 10000 ! :D (in dream)

Suddenly many zombies came. Felt deja vu cuz I had a similar dream before. Setting was in polyu

Used a long stick to tap sounds to lead them to the exit. Didn’t work lol Died I think And then I returned and learnt they got lured by penguins. So I used some plastic bag with yellow and black towels. One zombie just told me this doesn’t look like a penguin, it was too fake. And was following me along to attack me. I was embarrassed.

I think I died again but with slightly better progress. I came back to be part of a schools of (cosplayed) seals Using thick denim bras and skirts and move in a “seal like” way… Cuz apparently zombies get scared by seals and we guide them to the exit. And it was a success.

The school reran this zombie apocalypse again and using these tactics it was a success again. We found a stray zombie (Bindhiya) and me and another staff guided her back out.

In the dream zombies look just like humans but with dull green clothes.

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revising math; suic*dal ideation awareness vid

#PBLmate

At library (shelf looks like polyu lib). Math teacher/ tutor was saying we need to do the whole shelf’s worth of exercise. Looking at the thick exercise books, I actually thought it was attainable and I was planning how I can finish them all on time.

Suddenly, my attention was drawn to a youtube video/ movie, which was played on screen.
The uploader was “Jake vids” (by yanni)

The vid started off with a catastrophic scene. Many donkeys were running aimlessly around an erupting volcano, panicking but there was no use escaping. I felt a bit pity for them, until they un-morphed themselves and reveal themselves as mentally ill people.

Then, the video focused on the parents of these mentally ill people. It took place in a teaching complex. It’s less like a school and more like a training facility, with many floors. This scene was starring my PBL mates, who were escaping from one “parent”, who was now with the appearance of a scary monster.

They entered a toilet to hide. I forgot who went in first, but second was Esther and the third was (?? Forgot name), who was Matthew’s friend _{(that he kept mentioning irl)}, being pushed by Matthew into the toilet. Matthew then entered, and closed the door after other PBL mates entered. I was in third person view as a spectator in the toilet. Although I knew I wasn’t part of the story, I still felt very tense because I felt the monster was about to arrive at the door. Later it arrived at the door which somehow was opened slightly. And then the dream paused here.

school opening

#ivan #cch

Aw man i forgot this dream! Because I didn’t write it down immediately. I just knew this

Oh so basically after that math exercise book scene, I was packing my school bag for my first day of school? With loads of exercise books and textbooks. I was checking my class schedule, which looked like in the format of primary / secondary school’s, and realised majority of the classes were R.S. (Religious studies), which was by cch. Even though I actually had no interest in RS, I was pretty happy because that means I can see cch every day for most of the time :))

Anyways I think Ivan was waiting for me for a study meetup, and after that I had to meet with Nicole Chan in the basement learning commons in another block. And I was already running a bit late but I was trying my best to walk quicker.

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fucked in therapy room

#arthur AhahahauagahH nice afternoon nap

In his room. Imagining I had a dog collar on my neck and Arthur was holding me on a leash I was on my four limbs on the ground while he’s sitting in his usual office chair. We were in the orientation of looking towards the door. Apparently I got more excited if I look at the door because I would be anxious if people would come in anytime. Also in this orientation I could imagine myself in Arthur’s position, looking at the sofa bed.

He’s using his two fingers to… massage me in the inside hahwahahaha

Felt very good. Breathing quite deeply. I had to kept semiconsciously remind myself to not verbally moan out irl cuz I was in the hotel room irl and my parents were here 😩😩

On the other hand I was imagining myself squeezing Ruth’s boobs again ahhwahhaaha But I wanna deny the fact that I only like Ruth instead of Arthur so I try to divert my attention in dream back to Arthur.

We had some extra fun. I think I gave him a blowjob but I wasn’t sure.

Akakakakaamajahahhahwwawawahahaha

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shopping for binders

At first I went to play the claw machines. One pull required $40. I missed my first pull. I tried a second time, and got two chiikawa dolls in one go. I was a bit ambitious so I went for a third pull, trying to get a bigger chiikawa doll, but it was too heavy and didn’t move. So I stopped there and left happily with my two plushies.

Later I went to a stationery store, shopping for binders. I was looking for, oddly specifically, 6 hole binders that was like B5 or something. A shopkeeper came and taught me how to use this “innovatively designed” binder. The binder has a cover/ shell. She taught me I needed to slide the binder on a particular side, and it would slide into the cover automatically (as if it was magnetic). It took a few tries for me to get the hang of it. But once I figured it out, I had fun sliding lol. On the other side of the binder there was like a cut in the binder cover itself (like the cut in red packets where you hold the lid into), and it would hold itself open… Anyways I was sliding the binder and that’s basically the dream.

---

_{random thought if sigmund freud sees this he’ll probably exclaim some shit about women being horny and want penetration (like the magnetic cover) smh}

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watching porn

Watching porn in dream. _{Maybe because I was listening to it as I’m falling asleep. aaaaa}

therapy in dream

#arthur #sally #PBLmate #uni

(Office in a corridor which was like a labyrinth.. many rooms in it which made me feel like it’s one of the toilet compartments. The walls of the office were all clear glass / matte glass. Others can peek into it. Leaning on the very top of the toilet compartments, I was investigating how to hack into the cctv in the “toilet” as it can show the insides of the office. I wanna know what Arthur’s doing in the office. Somehow Arthur was in the adjacent toilet compartment and also leaning on top, trying to exploit into the CCTV and/ or add his own camera next to the preexisting cctv too.

I saw Sally by the office. I asked her what’s up, turned out she was attending therapy as well and liked Arthur too. Her nickname for Arthur is “Fur fur”. I was happy that I found someone alike (also liked Arthur like me), but also felt envious / jealous… I also shared my nickname for Arthur to be “Arf arf”. She then suggested a nickname for Ronnie, which was “Wang wang (ron ron)”. I praised her for her cleverness that it was such a brilliant idea (LMAO).

After waiting for a while outside the labyrinth…

Finally! It’s time for my therapy session. I’ve been waiting for so long (almost a month without seeing him). I packed my stationery and psych textbooks (lol) and headed to his office.

I entered and took a seat. For some reason it was suddenly very loud outside, as if a (oddly specific London) bus was parking by, or construction work had commenced. I think he told me to lie on the couch instead of taking the seats. But I can only guess what he’s talking. And this time I wanted to take the seats because I wanted to look at him after so long. And I’ve been sitting to meet with Ming. I saw the seats were so close together. I asked him about it (I thought he’s gonna take my opposite seat). Instead he stayed in his office desk which was very far away and explained something like he had to go everywhere to catch his client back to therapy.

I looked at him and his face looked like Raymond’s. With small eyes.

He asked about the “incident”. He asked, “Your dad would be notified at some point. What if he knows, is it okay for you?” I thought about it. I didn’t want them to know. And idk why would they know if I’m already legal. But unwillingly, I answered, “If he know then he knows. I won’t actually die if he knows about it”

Suddenly as we were about to properly start the convo, two admin staff barged in. One looked like Raymond again, and the other looked like a random music tan skinned hk local dude.

He signalled me to wait for a while. The tan skinned dude handed him a laptop and headphones. He began to do some tweaks to a music project.

What happens after this was on a semi? Conscious level so idk if it counts as a dream Basically started to recap and visualise everything in the incident, trying to recall the “forgotten” bits but to no avail again

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